Anger Management

"Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger. For the anger of man does not bring about the righteousness of God. Therefore, put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls."

Sin is frustrating. Frankly, it often makes me angry--angry with myself and angry with others. I can testify, though, that James' evaluation in the verses above is accurate: anger does not produce righteousness, not in me and not in others. Thankfully, God has given us some instructions in the verses above about how we can relate to one another in a way that shuts down anger and promotes righteousness, and how we can fight the inner battle of self-loathing and instead respond to the Spirit.

First, how can we respond to each other in a way that dispels anger and promotes righteousness? In typically practical terms, James says we can be eager to listen with understanding ("be quick to hear"), have a humble hesitancy to voice our own opinion ("be slow to speak"), and determine that we will not be easily provoked ("be slow to anger"). It's pretty simple advice, but in the heat of an argument, things can look complicated. My mind swirls with accusations and comebacks and "Oh no, you didn't!"s. I need simple.

What about when we are angry with ourselves? Sometimes I think my conscience has been replaced by the world's worst soccer coach. He berates me for all my mistakes, pointing each one out and telling me that I must be a fool, an idiot, an ingrate to keep messing this stuff up. But you know what? After one of those internal tirades, I never find myself resting in God's steadfast love or considering the ransom he paid for my sin. Do you know why? Because self-loathing is not repentance, and therefore, won't help us receive grace. Usually, this kind of anger is pride. I'm angry because I think I should have performed better than I did (the inner soccer coach takes over here), and I reproach myself out of pride.

So if I can't change my heart by reproaching myself, what am I supposed to do? Heaven knows I don't want to stay the way I am! James says first to "put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness;" simply, to stop sinning. Whatever it is, quit doing it. Then we are to "receive with meekness the implanted word." The Greek word translated as meekness is an interesting one. It means to be reined in, as in the way one would use the reins to direct a horse. It doesn't have anything to do with weakness, but with being controlled for a purpose. James says to receive from God as one being reined in, for the purpose of righteousness. And what are we to receive? "The implanted word, which is able to save your souls." I think this implanted word is the Holy Spirit, the ever-present counselor who plants God's words in our hearts to convict and encourage us. We can fire the angry soccer coach and rely on the Spirit to help us see our sin and turn from it.